A new home, a new part of the country to familiarise myself with, new friends to make and new work to focus on. This is my New Leaf. Change is something that I am very familiar with as I am part of a world where I have to move on every few years. I often leave good friends and colleagues behind and places that I have loved, but doing it regularly doesn’t make it any easier for me to accept it!
Change is hard and can be scary, but we should not be so fearful of it. Why is it scary? Because it is unknown. Humans naturally crave comfort, thrive on routine and only think to change when something is not right.
Change is part of life, it is inevitable and one thing I can’t control. By accepting it in a way that is beneficial to me is now the only way that I can deal with it in a positive way. Part of my process is too stop the ‘blame game’, it is no-ones fault it is just the way it is. People move on, loved ones pass and every year the leaves fall off the trees. When change occurs it is easy to blame ourselves or others for the way we are feeling but that doesn’t help our stress and anxiety levels.
Change is a natural part of life
In order to accept change and not be afraid of it, we have to be comfortable with the unknown. We don’t always know the outcome of certain things, and when a change initially occurs, it can feel like we are losing something—a friend or a job. But you don’t know what will happen in the future.
What feels like a loss now could end up being a win later.
Life is constantly moving forward, often I will look back and think, “Thank goodness I made that change, it was so hard at the time, but it was necessary to lead me to the better, more positive place I am today.”
Let’s all embrace the change for a better future
My 5 steps to accepting change...
- Embrace your feelings about change. Whatever type of change is unsettling you, embrace that feeling. If you embrace your feelings, it will be a lot easier to accept and move on.
- Understand that change is an inevitable part of life. It is necessary for old things to go and new things to come. Simple as that!
- Try to put change in perspective. Try to reframe the situation, are the worry’s and concerns you have about the impending change realistic or accurate?
- See the positives. Use this as an opportunity to turn a loss or negative change into an opportunity or a way to improve your life
- Why does the change unsettles you so much. It’s hard to accept change, if you’re unclear about why it makes you so uncomfortable or unsettled. Think about when change has happened in the past and how this made you feel then. Understanding where these habits have come from helps us to understand why we fear them.
Finally some self-care tips- It is important to manage managing the stress and anxiety that change brings.
- Talk about it with those close to you.
- Set some goals and address the challenges that it brings.
- Take up mindfulness or other relaxing exercise.
- Keep busy!
3 responses to “Accepting change, a personal battle…”
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[…] as we start to bring self-care into our lives, some of the people around us seem unsettled too. Change can be uncomfortable for us all – but that doesn’t mean it’s not […]
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[…] New Leaf Counselling: Accepting change blog post […]
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